Kicking You Out Of My Life

Dear Empire United Soccer Academy of evil,
I must admit, our relationship never really went anywhere. I think we can all agree that we were never really fond of each other since day one. While you were talking about your latest lover or the next big teen heart-throb, I was thinking about the themes of the last book I had read or how I would create a time machine out of string for our next Odyssey of the Mind skit. Clearly we were on different pages.

Despite our differences, we were a team and I made sure that I worked my butt off at practice to become a better player and teammate. I made sure that I sprinted to every cone, focused on my first touch, and tried to make a perfect pass every time I got the ball. I'll admit that I wasn't the best on the team, but the lack of understanding when I did mess up felt as though a lion was scratching at my heart with every glare that you shot in my direction.

I didn't help that you all had perfect hair, makeup and clothing. While you sported the new Total 90s in the season's latest color running up and down the field like a supermodel on a runway, I wore my 3-year old adidas spikes that were ripping on the side like a bum on a city sidewalk. While you came to practice in your brand new Uggs, I wore my boots from Target, hoping that no one would notice the absent name-brand tag on the back. After all, there wasn't much money left over after you sucked thousands of dollars from my parent's wallets.

I think the thing that pained me the most out of relationship was the fake niceness that you showed towards me. Remember that time that you excluded me from your vicious circle of gossip? Or the time your smile exuded an air of superiority? Or what about that time when you looked up, and passed the ball in a different direction just so that you din't pass it to me? I'm sure you don't remember these instances, but they will forever we stored in my mind next to the day of my first communion, 9/11, and my first concert.

Then there was the time commitment. My social life was nearly obliterated when I joined the squad. The phrase, "I can't, I have soccer" poured out of my mouth on a daily basis, even though I dreaded going to practice everyday. My stomach would churn with anxiety hours before a practice due to a fear of the unknown. What mistakes would I make? Would I have a partner for the drills? Would I get yelled at? The questions filled my head.

And so, as the season ended I knew that our relationship would have to be terminated for my sake and for yours. I guess this decision would be a lot more difficult if we had had more tallies in the win column, but alas we did not. I know my departure will be filled with adjustment for both of us as you will have to find someone new to blame everything on, and I will have to get used to playing soccer without the constant anxiety paralyzing my body, but I sure that with persistence we'll get through this. Although I'd love to reminisce about our not so fond times together, I must run.

Literally, my track team's counting on me.

Abby